Beating Blue Monday with Funny Construction Jokes
Blue Monday in the office
After the excitement of Christmas and New Year, the next event on the calendar is a bit more dismal; Blue Monday, the most depressing day of the year. And with rain in the air and the Carillon news in the media, it is a blue day for us indeed in the construction industry!
On the third Monday of January each year, it has been calculated that we are at peak grumpy, due to a combination of factors including the weather and looming Christmas debt. But here in the Pier office we have decided to try and cheer things up a bit. It so happens that this year Blue Monday coincides with a holiday from over the pond; in the US it’s National Strawberry Ice cream Day.
So never missing an opportunity for a snack, we have decided to combine the two together in an effort to beat the January blues, wearing colourful clothes to brighten up the office and eating ice cream to brighten up our outlook.
Funny Construction Jokes to cheer you up on a Blue Monday
For all of you that are feeling a bit glum today, we’ve compiled a list of construction jokes in an attempt to cheer you up. Mostly about electricians. Sorry electricians.
A contractor dies in a tragic accident on his 40th birthday. He ascends to heaven where he is greeted at the pearly gates by a brass band and Saint Peter himself. Saint Peter shakes his hand warmly and says “Congratulations!”
The contractor is a little confused. “Congratulations for what?” “Well, we’re celebrating the fact that you lived the grand old age of 160!”
“But that’s not right”, says the contractor, “I only lived to be 40.” “That’s impossible” replies Saint Peter. “We added up your time sheets!”
I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker. But when I got home all the signs were there.
Do you want to hear a construction joke? Oh, sorry I’m still working on it.
Q Why do engineers enjoy fixing steelwork together?
A Because it’s riveting
Q How do construction workers party?
A They raise the roof!
Q How many safety inspectors does it take to change a light bulb?
A Four. One to change it and three to hold the ladder.
Four surgeons are discussing who makes the best type of surgery patient. The first surgeon says “I like to see accounts on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.” The second responds “Yeah, but you should try electricians. Everything inside them is colour coded!”
The third surgeon says “No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside is in alphabetical order.” The fourth surgeon chimes in “You know, I like construction workers. They seem to understand when you have a few parts left over at the end and when the job takes longer than you said it would.”
Q Why are the electricians always up to date?
A Because they are “current specialists”
Q What kind of car does an electrician drive?
A A Volts-wagon
Q What’s the difference between an Electrician and God?
A God doesn’t think he’s an Electrician
Q How many welders does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A Nobody knows; it’s not in their job description.
Q What do plumbers have when they fall asleep?
A Pipe dreams
Q How many plasterers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A None, that’s a sparky’s job.
A man at a train stop shows off pictures of his three sons to a friend. “What do your boys do for a living?” asked the friend. “Well, my youngest is a neurosurgeon and my middle son is a lawyer”.
“What does the oldest do?” asked the friend. The father replied “He’s the plumber that put them all through school”.
